Opinion

Bill Harvey: And now for the fake news

Bill Harvey
​It’s been an odd year in many ways so a degree of levity is justified

It’s been an odd year in many ways so a degree of levity is justified.

First, some fake news. The Commission Internationale de l’Eclairage announced that the somewhat archaic label applied to a patient showing an inability to distinguish red and green, Daltonism, would now be changed to ‘urban cyclist.’

New guidance on advice to coeliac patients has filtered through, due to too many not taking optometrist’s advice to avoid wheat seriously enough, resulting in a number of freak combine harvester accidents.

Meanwhile, stem cell research has continued apace with a recent paper highlighting the success of the team first able to demonstrate the growth of human vocal cords in the lab. The results speak for themselves (as announced on Radio 4 by Jack Dee).

I was recently asked about the funniest thing that happened to me at work. Of the various incidents we can print, I have to say the time when my then pre-reg was complaining insistently about a strange smell from her consulting room springs to mind. When I next had a gap in clinic, I went to her room and there was indeed a musty smell. I left her to check the rota while I investigated further. It seemed the smell was coming from the old consulting room chair. To be sure, I got on my knees and started sniffing the chair – at which point she appeared with the next patient. ‘This is my supervisor,’ she announced before I could lift my face from the chair.

Happy end of year everyone.